Halloween. A time for fun parties with friends. For making excuses that it’s somehow okay to eat insane amounts of candy. And for dressing up in costume. For some of us, we just want to check that last part off the list. Like we know we need to dress up – and may even want it to be cute or funny – but we want the process of selecting and dressing in the costume to be as easy and quick as possible. Adam is not one of those people.

For as long as I can remember, Halloween has been a time for Adam to transform his entire being. It’s not about a simple costume. It’s about becoming that character. He treats it very seriously. Never does it half-ass. And really commits to it from start to finish. A method actor, if you will.

Here are a few examples.

A year or two out of college, he was invited to a party some friends were having in his apartment building. And he decided he wanted to be William Wallace. Or for those of you who that means nothing to…Mel Gibson in Braveheart*.

And he was fully committed. Not only to the blue face painting…I mean, that’s just child’s play. Oh and he also rocked a pretty awesome Scottish kilt (that he sewed by hand since he couldn’t find one that really fit the look he needed). But he also felt like the sword needed to be…what’s the word for it? Real. So he purchased a two-handed long sword on Craig’s List (I’m sure that exchange must have been totally normal). And it was a great “prop” until he realized what a bad idea it was to have a real-life viking sword out at a bar surrounded by drunk people who wanted to fight with it.

But I think my favorite part about this costume is the mud. You see, Adam needed to really capture the authenticity of having just completed battle out in a field. And he felt having mud all over his body would be the way to accomplish that. Now, I may not know a whole lot about it, but with a quick search on Amazon, you’ll see that you can easily buy dirt for the type of special effects he was going for. But as you can imagine, that wasn’t really up to par for him. So instead, right before the party, he decided to roll around in mud. Like actual mud, on the ground. Only he lived in a luxury apartment building, so rolling around in mud outside the entrance would likely have been frowned up. So he went out back behind the garage, where he found some muddy puddles. Unfortunately, given the location, it contained the run-off from the parking lot and was filled with what could only be described and grimy, thick disgustingness. He saw it and thought: perfect! So he covered his arms and legs in it, and headed straight up for the party. He insists that people were only “impressed” by his commitment to the character, and not at all bothered by the smell that was likely emanating from his body.

I think one of my favorite costumes of his came a few years later. It doesn’t need much introduction or background, but he was a pretty incredible “Dick in a box.”

The only mishap to this costume was the fact that he used a banana in the box and covered it with a condom. So after a few hours, it got really overripe and by the end of the night appeared as though he had a squished black penis…which was just weird.

Last year my daughters had wanted to be Dorothy and Glinda from the Wizard of Oz. I opted for a cute scarecrow costume. He went the full body lion onesie route.

But I think the most over the top costume is the one he will be unveiling tonight (on Halloween 2016). I should mention that he wanted to wear it to the adult-only Halloween party we had last weekend. But I immediately vetoed it. I mean, besides being mortified by it, there was absolutely no way I could allow him to wear this to a house party in someone else’s home. Hopefully in seeing it you’ll agree…

Now, where to begin. First, with the obvious. It’s huge. In fact, I don’t think the picture even quite captures the size of it. He literally cannot fit through a door. Like for him to wear it trick or treating tonight, he will need to start by being outside, and self-inflate from the there. You also cannot see his face – at all. So there would literally be no way to even have a conversation with him. But he’s not too concerned about this because – why would a dinosaur need to talk? And then there’s the whole inflation thing. It is incredibly loud. He has a portable fan attached to his hip inside the costume that is keeping him inflated at all times. So there is a constant (and not so subtle) mechanical type hum surrounding him wherever he goes. You pretty much can’t hold a conversation at all (with anyone) if he’s in the room.

So, indoor house party…absolutely not. Trick or treating with the kids…possibly the most epic costume ever.

#shmadum

 

*Still trying to track down a photo of him in his Braveheart costume, which we know exists. If anyone reading this has it – please send it!